Jealousy exists in all kinds of relationships, predominantly in romantic relationships. If your partner is overly nice to someone of the opposite sex, you may experience dread, fear, anger or uneasiness… this may be a sign that the green-eyed monster is lurking.
Jealousy is an ironic emotion.
Once the monster claims a spot, you won’t be able to enjoy the time with your partner. When you are jealous you want your partner to come closer but in actuality you push them away and create what you fear. Once jealousy strikes, you tend to notice other minor details that further prove your presumptions.
Ask yourself…why are you insecure? Is this your issue or is it your partner’s?
When you are jealous you leave no personal space for your partner, eventually pushing them away.
A possessed love can never grow strong.
On the flip side, why has this emotion evolved, and continued to stay with us, for all these years? There has to be some benefits that this monster brings.
The fact that you get jealous, could be partly because you care about your partner. We tend not to get jealous over things that are insignificant to us. On the flip side, when your partner gets jealous, this could make you feel good about yourself.
Similar to other types of emotions, jealousy signals something – danger. The green-eyed monster lets you know when there’s the threat of losing something or someone important. Ultimately, jealousy serves to prevent loss. For once, the monster is not entirely evil.
So now what? Does the monster stay, or go?
Neither. The monster should be tamed, and the following are some strategies that can help you deal with it:
1. Communicate with your partner how and why you are feeling this way. Honesty is of utmost importance in this situation. Try not to blame your partner for how you are feeling, but simply acknowledge, and verbalize it.
2. Seek objective advice from an outsider. Speaking to a therapist can be helpful to assist you in letting go of this bad habit.
3. Calmly and objectively observe your partner. Try to notice if your thoughts are based on reality or not, and whether there is something to worry about.
4. Have the consequences in mind. Jealousy can rigorously affect our mood, daily routines and relationship with others. Think about the outcome if your jealousy gets out of control. Try not to allow the green-eyed monster to rob you of the time you have with your loved one.